Day 5 -- :(

Today has been not so good.  The first part of the day was okay, but after lunch time I started feeling the pain a whole lot more.  I'm still on my pain meds but it seems to be wearing off quicker and by the end of the day I feel like falling apart.  I think depression has started setting in too.  I haven't been out of the house since I got home Thursday and I'm normally not a homebody.  This evening after my husband and son got home from church, I lost it and don't even really know why.  I can't breathe through my nose because it is so stuffed up from surgery, and they told me I can't blow my nose for 2 weeks because of nosebleeds.  My face feels like it has been stretched as far as it will go and it burns and feels so tight.  My lips are HUGE and are chapped and burn.  I have kept them covered in Aquaphor the whole time.  That is what the doc recommended and I love that stuff.  My bruising is starting to show more and I feel like some distorted monster.  When I touch my cheeks, mouth and chin I cannot feel anything at all, so when I eat and drink I have to be extra careful or all my food will be running out of my mouth.  There is no sugar-coating for this type of surgery.  It is very brutal - but I hope and pray that it will all be worth it in the end, and look forward to the day when I can look back and say "I'm glad I did it and I'm glad it's all over." 

Here's day 5's picture...more bruising starting under the eyes.....

and this is a beginning of a smile, I'm working on this each day....